My Gumball Heart

My heart is like a gumball, starting off bright and colorful.
Perfectly seamless and happily surrounded by others that complimented it beautifully, to create an illuminated sea of happiness for someone with a single desire.
I dispensed my heart, bright and shiny into the hand of someone who really desired a different color. They were never quite being happy with what mine had to offer, even when I gave my all.
It hurts now, chewed up and spit out; left without color, shape, or form. I wonder how I will ever again find the beautiful brilliance it once gleamed. It almost seems impossible, but surely with time I will be able to reshape and remold it to possess some of the desirable appeal it once had. Although, I do wonder if it will ever again be able to illuminate so vibrantly, as to attract the heart of someone who desires the color and flavor that it holds.
I'm scared to death, to let it go again. I have it clenched tightly in my fist, like a small child in fear of it being taken away, clutched to my chest and desperately trying to protect it. I just hope that when the time comes and that someone comes along, I will be able to loosen my grip.
I know it won't be perfect and it will bare white scars, while my palm showing signs of color that bled from it; however, I long for the day that someone makes me feel safe and secure enough that I will be able to trustfully share with them my gumball heart in an outstretched and open hand.

Jeni